You read that title correctly. I was sat on by a large, corpulent woman. She would have been refused a seat on an airplane. Seriously. But that didn't stop her from giving no warning and sitting "next" to me on the bus this morning.
My personal space issues aside, this was a 90 degree southern California morning. Her folds enveloped the right side of my body from shoulder to knee, like a thick blanket. *shiver*
Even worse, I know that she couldn't reach all parts of herself when bathing, because of the strange mixture of B.O. and deodorant. The entire 10 minute ride I could feel my gag reflex tickling the back of my throat.
But the straw that broke my proverbial back is this: when I attempted to squeeze myself closer to the window, she gave me an offended "how dare you" look, and huffed "how rude..." I couldn't take it, I just couldn't.
I responded, "Ma'am, you are excused for sitting on me. I know that it must be difficult for you to ride on public transportation, seeing as it is designed to accommodate people of only semi-rotund girth, and you quite obviously exceed that size. You are not however, excused for claiming that I am rude, when I am only seeking to extricate myself from beneath you. I am sure you are very aware of your situation and should know that it is a discourtesy to sit on a person without warning or apology."
My tone was... 'strained politeness' might be a slight exaggeration, but it was close. She gave me a look that said she would murder me and all my family if she could and then stared straight ahead the remainder of the ride.
All this took place while she sat on me. Goo.
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1 comment:
I'm sorry for your loss . . . of personal space.
I don't have any respectful words for the - uh, corpulenza, so I'll end this comment here. :)
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