Monday, June 4, 2012

Growing up...

I wanted to comment on my buddy Bags blog post, but my thought started to be too long for a comment. So I have put it here instead, as I am sure he will read it.

First, Bags, I admire that you are able to simply reset so many things in your life. You just are not that attached to things. That is a unique, amazing, and - quite frankly - dumbfounding attribute. Take that, keep it, and improve it. Share it with your friends. We need it.

Second, I like the metaphor you use of 52-card pick up. Life can and does seem very frustrating and repetitive in many ways. We have a choice to hate it and complain about it... or... we recognize it is a game and love to live our lives.  After our little get together this weekend and the conversations that we had, I think it is interesting that you feel this way about life. Not because you shouldn't feel that way, but that I feel that way as well. I have for years now. I described it to Kelly as juggling, but routinely dropping the balls... but having to pick them back up and do it again. Kel just said that is what life is and to stop complaining. That type of "advice" - while delivered with love - is not helpful to me.  It did however make me think of some great advice that I received when I was thinking of doing something silly (drop out of school). I got it in a letter, so I can give it to you word for word, but will inject your name.

"Dear [Bags],  I know that you have expressed a frustration with how slowing school is progressing and you think that you should strike out on your own.  You could, and I believe you would be successful. However, you should also remember that you are not as mature as you believe you are. You will likely never be as mature as you think you are until you have grandchildren. That is when you will begin to see how life really unfolded and how short this period of life truly is.  You see, Bags, maturity is many things. It is the ability to base a judgement on the big picture, the long haul. It means being able to resist the urge for immediate gratification and opt for the course of action that will pay off later. One characteristic of the young is 'I want it now.' Grown up people can wait. Remember what Albert Grey said: The secret of success of every man that has ever been successful, lies in the fact that he developed the habit of doing things that failures don't like to do."

I can see that you have developed many habits of doing things that failures don't like to do. One is taking risk. Another is starting again when those risks don't work out the way you thought they would. Keep the faith, you are doing amazing. From the point of view of someone that sees you about once a year... you are making far more progress than you think.

Heard this before?

"You can't put a price on a good education." or so they say... I would say that is just stupid. Of course you can. Otherwise we wouldn't have Ivy League schools. It is a stupid sentiment like that, which has resulted in massive amounts of student loan debt... which I think I last heard is in the trillions of dollars.

You know what else we used to hear? "House prices always go up." As most of my friends are just graduating or fairly recently graduated... I want to wish you all good luck. "C'mon, big money, big money, no whammy...STOP!"