Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Shivers up my spine...

Here comes another story from the train.

I was asked by a stranger to please sit next to her. This was a request, mind you, not a question. She asked, "if [I] would please sit next to [her]." She didn't even know who I was. I smiled politely and showed her my wedding ring. She responded with, "even better."

I just had to ask why she would want a married stranger to sit next to her? Her answer: cause there are some seriously creepy SOB's in this world. I was way too intrigued... I had to sit down.

Friends, this is how I learned that there are some people in this world where, it may have been better if they were never born. I like to think that I am a fairly open-minded person, who has a gift for discerning the light that is (supposedly) in all of us. That is why I stressed "may" earlier... but this man that I am about to tell you all about literally gave me shivers and I wanted to throw up, just from the feelings that I got from him.

She managed to tell me that there is a man that follows her from train car to train car, and that he doesn't catch any of the hints that she gives. That was all she could get out before some guy scared the Hell out of me, by putting his face between our seats from behind and says, "I thought that was you!" He then comes around to the other side of the seats and sits down across from us. I assumed (correctly) that this was our creep. Without telling you every painful detail, and they were painful, I will say this. The man is either socially inept with an utter disregard for personal space (you NEVER touch a woman's thigh like that... ever), or he is a sociopath that does not care whether the poor woman is uncomfortable. This poor lady, tried everything during the first 20 minutes of the ride. She ignored him, she asked him to please not touch her, she told him not to touch her, she said that she was very uncomfortable with his topic of conversation (tip to my single friends, don't talk about how a woman reminds you of a porn that you once saw, she WILL NOT find that flattering... ugh!), and lastly she looked at me with pleading eyes.

I know some of you are wondering why I let it go on for 20 minutes. The only thing I can say is. HE WAS FREAKING CREEPY! I was trying to figure out what was wrong with him. Seriously. I was thinking to myself that he must have been dropped as a child, or abandoned, or made fun of through High School. SOMETHING, must explain why he felt that was a good way to talk to a girl.

Sorry, I digress.

So when she looked to me for help, and there was no mistaking this look, I said to him: "you have made both of us very uncomfortable, please go to another car." I kid you not, he pretended like I hadn't even opened my mouth. Completely ignored me. This actually really bothered me, I hate to be so poignantly ignored. So before I could stop myself, I let something slip (my family knows about my Turrets). It wasn't the nicest thing, but it didn't include any profanity. He didn't ignore that, oh no, he looked at me and said, "...I have killed animals bigger than you." Then he SMILED at her, as though to disarm her.

It was at this point that I stood up, offered my hand to the damsel, and we left that train car. He tried to get up and follow, but I pushed him back into his seat, leaned close, and as calmly as I could, "I am not an injured animal that you chained in your garage, you psycho. If you follow us, I will break your face." Posturing over, I quickly escorted her to a different car.

When we arrived in LA, I walked her to the Sheriffs that were on the platform and told them the story. They said they would escort her to where she was going, and that one of them would go talk to the man (who was waiting about 30 yards away. *shiver*).

So everyone, if I happen to go missing... look for the fifty-odd year old that rides the Orange County line, that wears 80's style prescription glasses, and has a lumpy nose. If I saw in the paper that this guy had been kidnapping and killing people, I would not be surprised. He honest to goodness, scared the crap out of me. So creepy...

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Lemonade? what a load of crap.

recently i was told something that i am sure we all hear often. "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade." but, just think about how dumb that is... no, really, think about it.

lemonade is not just lemon juice. it has water and sugar as well... lots of it. water dilutes, and sugar sweetens. so when life gives us lemons (something bitter) how the crap are you supposed to make something sweet out of that, with out having... well, something sweet. and if you have something sweet, then you don't really have a bitter situation after all, do you?

i know... i am a hopeless Cynic.